the toenail An Important Part Of The Whole

I am thankful for…

restlessness.

Wait just a minute – hear me out on this.

Restlessness is defined in Miriam Websters as:

1)   lacking rest or denying rest
2)   in constant motion

And my favorite:

3)   characterized by or manifesting unrest especially of mind

I’m a huge fan of “being still” and listening, but I also know that restlessness has it’s place, too.  If it weren’t for restlessness, or rather, discontent, would we ever be likely to make any changes or move from a spot of comfort?

I recently made a change in employment.  This was a difficult decision for me, and one that I brushed off and failed to consider for many, many months.  About 18 months, to be exact.  I worked for a wonderful employer – a great family business.  I liked everyone that I worked with (many with whom I will be forever connected).  I enjoyed my job, and frankly, I was quite good at it.  I had a roomy office.  Flexible hours.  I was comfortable.

Comfortable.

About two years ago, I began praying about my place within the body of Christ and for revelation as to how my gifting is to be used in Glorifying the Savior (hence the name of this blog, The Toenail).  I’m talking boldly asking Jesus to use me – to show me the path that He wants me walking on, so I can giddy up to the right trail.  I prayed to be made uncomfortable, afraid that I would become complacent to His will for my life.  It wasn’t long after I began praying about this that I started to notice a building restlessness.  I asked for it, so why did it take me so long to act on it!?  God’s timing is always perfect, and I have no doubt that the 18 months it took for me to step outside of my very comfortable office was part of His also always perfect plan.  When I accepted a new position with a different employer, I really had no idea of what the job would entail.  It was truly a leap of faith for me.  I have never experienced such freedom before.  How crazy is that?  I wasn’t real sure about what I’d be doing – but I was okay with that.  I wasn’t real sure of whom I’d be working with – but I was okay with that, too.  I also wasn’t real sure of the hours I would need to work, vacation days, and all of that other HR stuff you usually find out about before you accept a job – and I was still okay with that, too.  I knew that God had been preparing me for this change during all those months of restlessness, and He had this.  Uncertain even about applying, then responding, then interviewing…I accepted opportunities as they came systematically, finally leading me to a new job.  And now that I’ve been behind a different desk for a little more than a week, I’m confident that I am where He wants me to be right now.

I am thankful for…

God so loving the world.
God giving His only son.
The gift of everlasting life.

On days like today, I lean into God’s promises and find comfort in His word.

Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the gift of Your son.

I am thankful for…

My daddy.

My daddy is a Marine.  He is a Marine who has served in Vietnam.  For my entire life, my daddy has been the strongest person I know.  I’m not talking about physical strength, although he has always been very active and, in my eyes, could and can do anything.  I’m talking about the kind of strength that comes from moral values and ethics.  I said recently to him that the way I see things, they are either black or white.  You know, wrong or right.  Dark or light.  At this, my dad got one of those tongue in cheek smiles – the kind that you’re trying not to show, but it just creeps across your face anyhow.  He said, “That’s how it is in the Marines!  They teach you things are either right or wrong – there is no in-between!”    Here I am in my 40-something year old life, and my daddy just heard me proclaim something that made his heart smile.  He saw himself in me – in my personality.  That part of me that is not so tangible.  I got that from my daddy, you know.  My unwillingness to live in or see things as gray.

“Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes’, and your ‘No’, ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”     -Matthew 5:37

Today is the Marine Corps Birthday, Lord, and tomorrow is Veterans Day.  Thank you, Father, for my daddy and for all veterans who have sacrificed to protect our freedoms, including the freedom of worship.  Father, what an inspiration my daddy has been to me.  That strength I have always admired in him, and have always found security in, I know is something I have, too, to pass on to my children.  I’m happy to have this character trait as part of my lineage, understanding that ultimately, Father, You are the source of the strength and security that is available to all of us.  Thank you for loving us so!  I love you, Jesus.  Amen.

I am thankful for…

God’s faithfulness.  It doesn’t change.  Ever!  His promises to us are for real, and forEVER.  I find great comfort in that as I go from day to day in a world where things seem to change constantly.

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases.
His mercies never come to an end.
They are new every morning.
Great is thy faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23 RSV)

In reflecting on this past week, I notice that there are quite a few things that did not go as I had planned.  Oh boy, do I like to plan things!  I love making lists and checking them off as I complete tasks.  At the end of the week, I can look at the list and “see” my productivity in the number of checked off boxes.  My little self loves the tangible evidence that a list provides.  Rarely, though, is the list completely checked off.  And the list never stays as neat as when I first write it down.  That’s because I have to add things and take things off the list.  Often I have to edit items on the list.  On Monday, the list is written in one color ink in print that is symmetrical and sparkly.  By the end of the week, at least 2 more colors of ink have been used on this list, there are scribbled out and squeezed in words, and usually a lot of doodling can be seen around the edges.  What a snapshot of life in general, isn’t it?  I’m so thankful that even more than I can bank on my list changing from day to day, I know — hear me — I KNOW that I never need to worry about God’s faithfulness changing.  When I start to freak out because my plans are not turning out the way I think they should, I take a deep breath and draw on the security of my Savior.  My Constant.  My Everlasting Balance.  He is the same yesterday.  He’ll be the same tomorrow.  And right now, in the midst of my multi-colored, messy list, He is the same.

I think I might start adding a new box to the very top of my list at the beginning of each week – a box I know I can put a check mark in and not have to scratch it out or edit it.  It will read:  GOD, and I will make it the biggest item on my list.  🙂

Heavenly Father, thank you for your tender loving care and your faithfulness that is foolproof, timeless and available in abundance.  Father, in a world that knocks me off my axis daily, let it be the knowledge of your faithfulness where I find comfort and reprieve.  Please help me remember this  as I adjust my list and my plans according to your will for my life, and not just in response to the world around me.  I love you, Jesus.  Amen.

I am thankful for…

…the “I love you!”, shouted across the yard by my ten-year-old, as I left to pick up his brother from tennis practice this afternoon.  It was actually a “Bye, mom, I love you!”.  I never get tired of hearing those words of endearment in the voices of my sons.

Thank you, Father, for blessing me so greatly with three amazing young men, who are confident and secure in Your love, allowing them to love others, including me, OUT LOUD and unashamedly.  Thank You, Thank You, Thank You!  Amen

November 7:  I am thankful for…

My husband.

We came really close to never meeting, you know.  Praise God my first impression of him didn’t “scare me off”.   Kevin contacted me via email through an online matchmaking website.  His screen name was GRMCLEAN.  You can imagine what I thought when I received an email from this “germ clean” guy.  “What kind of man would announce his germ-phobia that way?”, I thought.  I held my finger poised above the delete button, but decided to see what he had to say in his email before I sent it to the trash bin.  He sounded pretty harmless, actually, and genuine.  Hmmm.  Not at all what I expected from someone who boldly announced their paranoia through an online moniker choice.  After a couple of weeks emailing back and forth, I finally felt brave enough to ask him about his screen name.  Only brave enough, though, to ask from behind my own screen name, Felicity.  Stop laughing!  I put a lot of effort and time into my name selection.  Felicity actually means happiness, and I wanted to display that quality of myself in my moniker selection.  You see now why I wondered why Mr. I Don’t Like Germs would choose to label himself the way he did.  Our conversation went something like this:

Felicity: Hey, I was wondering something.

GRMCLEAN:  Ok.  What?

Felicity:  Why exactly do you call yourself Germ Clean?

GRMCLEAN:  What?

Felicity:  Your screen name.  Do you have a problem with germs?

—–long pause——–
—–so much so that I worried he’d signed off———-

GRMCLEAN:  No, NO!  That’s not what my screen name means!  See, I got this puppy recently.  And the screen name comes from her name.

Felicity:  Ok, now THAT is even weirder, I think.  Why would you name your DOG germ clean?

GRMCLEAN:  Haha!  No!  GR = Golden Retriever.  That’s the kind of dog she is.  And McLean is her last name according to her AKC papers.

We both just laughed and laughed about that.  For the first two weeks of our “getting to know you through emails” time, I did so with some serious reservations over that silly screen name.  And to think, I almost deleted his first email!  After that revelation, I felt comfortable enough to tell him my name wasn’t really Felicity.

We’ve been married for over eleven years now, and I cannot imagine NOT being with him.  I couldn’t ask for a more doting husband or dedicated father to our boys.  He loves and inspires me, challenges and encourages me.  I’m truly blessed.

Heavenly Father, thank you for uniting me with the man whom, I know without a shadow of a doubt, you personally chose just for me.  Father, may we honor you with our lives and bring glory to Your sweet name in all that we do.  Amen. 

November 6:  I am thankful for…

…FREEDOM.

Freedom of religion.
Freedom of speech.
The right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
The right to vote.
Freedom to move between states.

This year, November 11th is IDOP (International Day of Prayer for the Persecuted Church).  As so many in America argue over or celebrate the results of the recent presidential election, I can’t help but think about the privileges we have here, in comparison to so many other parts of the world.  I can carry my bible in public, without camouflaging it.  I can wear a cross around my neck without fear of it being seen.  I can pray pretty much any time, any place.  I can share The Good News openly.  I can attend church services in buildings or facilities that house regular meetings.  I can sport a Jesus fish and EBC sticker on my car, without fear of backlash.

Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the freedoms we all have in the United States.  I ask boldly, Father, that you continue to bless our nation as we move forward under Obama’s administration.  Please guide the steps of our president, whether he acknowledges Your hand of guidance or not, and protect the United States from harm.  Jesus, I pray for my brothers and sisters in Christ who are serving or living in the very darkest of places today.  May they be filled with your strength and encouragement as they press forth in areas where there are little to no freedoms, and where persecution reigns.  All this in your son’s sweet, holy name.  Amen.

November 5:  I am thankful for…

…God’s truth.

Today, I found myself in a waiting room filled with people who were seeking justice and fair measures.  People who wanted some type of relief or reprieve.  Bitter people.  Pride-filled people.  Angry people.  Belligerent, lost, worried and sad people.  Right people and not-so-right people.

I had a Journey devotional book with me in this room full of unsettled emotion, and opened it in search of some light.  In it, I read:

“When confronted with lies, Jesus didn’t allow the lies to confuse Him or undermine what He knew to be true.  Instead, He identified the lies as being from Satan.  He called them what they were – lies.  And he confronted them with the truth.  Because of Jesus’ wisdom, power, and authority, Satan was never able to deceive, distract, confuse, discourage, or defeat Him.  We are to become like Jesus, and His victory can apply to us in our daily battles.”

And then, I read it again.
And again.
And as I read it, I was comforted in this same waiting room.
I prayed in thanksgiving for My Savior – My Counsel – who was present with me in that waiting room.  The One who would work out my situation for His good.

Father, thank you for your truth.  Thank you for allowing this truth to resonate through my moments this afternoon, giving me the comfort needed to handle a very uncomfortable situation.  It is through Your Word that I find all the peace needed to see me through these life trials.  Thank you so much for loving me.  Amen.

November 4:  I am thankful for…

…friendship.

Specifically, the kind of friendship that does not wear labels or fit neatly into a box –
the kind that is true and trustworthy –
weathered and time tested –
steadfast and constant –
that does not judge, but encourages –
is challenging and accepting, all at once.

Today I was able to spend some time with my best friend and her family, as they are in town for a few days.  It doesn’t matter that there are hundreds of miles between our daily lives, and it doesn’t matter that our talks are far and few in-between.  When we are able to spend time together, it’s as if the days and years spent apart dissipate and we are just as close as we were when we were teenagers.

1988

1999

2012

In Proverbs 27:17 we are told, “As iron sharpens iron, a friend sharpens a friend.”  No doubt, my friend is definitely this to me.  I am so thankful for her!

November 3:  I am thankful for…

…rest.

Today has been a busting-at-the-seams Saturday.  We’re talking hours spent at a downtown festival, followed by hours spent working in the yard.  I have been totally surrounded by my family today, and on my feet for nearly 15 hours straight.  Wouldn’t change a thing though, including the aching feet, because the laughter and work was wrapped up in quality time with my family.

My body is physically exhausted, which is going to make for some solid rest tonight.  I’m so excited to have an “extra” hour to sleep in the morning.  But it’s not just my body that’s worn out after today.  The last few days – 9 to be exact – have been mentally exhausting.  With friends moving away, a new neighbor moving in, the pending election, an ending to something familiar, a beginning of something hoped to be familiar quickly – Yes!  Capital E exhausted mentally.  Today provided a welcomed reprieve – and tonight?  Well, I’m off to make sure I get to snoozing well before the clock chimes in a new day.

Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the blessing of a beautiful day and family to share it with.  You know, my Savior, what tires my head and troubles my feet.  Please bless the hours of rest for me tonight, and wake me in the morning with a rejuvenated spirit and body.  I love you, Jesus, and I am so thankful for your healing touch and comfort.  Amen.